Mundane Turbulence

Dearest Christian, where have you been?

I’ve been…well, ever-so busy. But I did somehow manage to pass two very interesting courses (my grades could’ve been better, but at least now I know my courseload limit – long classes four days a week is not for me). I’m not sure that I slept much more than 20 hours during my last week of classes, and I surely wasn’t working at my full potential between school and work, but hey…it’s done, and now I have only two semesters left until I’ve got a goddamn degree.

Those classes, by the way, really were great. One was Writing About Social and Ethical Issues (a graduation requirement). This one was really a lovely surprise: as anxious as I get in small classroom situations, it was such an open, casual, and supportive environment, that I was comfortable enough to share more than I have in any class since I started school up again. And after some very busy/overwhelming work days, those positive qualities provided a very pleasant respite.

The other class I took was Abnormal Psychology, which – duh – was fantastic. There was way too much work, and my final grade was crap (and a bit unfair), but I still learned so much about what is at the core of psychology, and I already feel better-versed in the field as a result. I’ve taken so many courses in the past from which I learned and grew very little, but it’s been so refreshing this round to actually further my career and personal goals through schooling. I suppose that’s what all people aim to do in college, but it hadn’t really worked out for me until this point. I’m wondering in what ratio that’s been my fault vs. the fault of the prevailing academic structure…at MassArt for instance, I had hoped to find a different paradigm, but it wasn’t there. So…I must be different now? Because I’m pretty sure that academia hasn’t made the shift.

Anyhoo, Research Assisting – it has been pretty bomb. To wit:

[names snipped because it's a pain to ask permission!] and Herwitz, C. (2008, August). Prospective Analysis of Risk and Resilience Variables in Firefighters. Poster session presented at the annual meeting of the American Psychological Association, Boston, MA.

[names snipped because it's a pain to ask permission!] and Herwitz, C. (2008, August). Preliminary Report on Prospective Firefighter Recruit Study. Poster session presented at the annual meeting of the American Psychological Association, Boston, MA.

Booyeah! And a photo:

Lookit that shit-eating grin!

By far, the best part of the APA conference was getting to see Jon Kabat-Zinn give an address. Kabat-Zinn basically brought mindfulness meditation, a component of Buddhist Psychology, into mainstream western medicine, with the goal of alleviating the suffering of patients with severe psoriasis (he’s a molecular biologist). He found that the patients who added mindfulness into their treatment regimen actually healed faster than those who did not. From there, incorporation of mindfulness spread all over the place, specifically into psychology, and it’s just so hot right now, and so is Kabat-Zinn. He started his lecture by having all however-hundred-many people in the audience meditate. Aw yeah.

Kabat-Zinn also shared many really great quotes from prominent people throughout history that indicated their overt or apparent philosophical affinities with Buddhist thought. One great quotation was from Einstein, who was actually quite familiar with Buddhism:

A human being is part of the whole, called by us “Universe”; a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest – a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole nature in its beauty. Nobody is able to achieve this completely but striving for such achievement is, in itself, a part of the liberation and a foundation for inner security.

I gotta say…the more I learn about Einstein, the more he freaking rules. He originally wrote that to a rabbi who had asked Einsten what he should tell his young child, upon the passing of a young sibling. The sentiment is a beautiful ideal – one that I’m not entirely sure I intend to strive for, but it’s very nice all the same, and must have been a pretty revolutionary way to think in the West during Einstein’s time. I would’ve loved to have known him…and stroked his super-sweet ‘stache.

Anyway, now onto the next semester…planning to take the GRE again, taking the Psych GRE, taking three classes: Positive Psychology, Clinical Psychology, and Emotion (and hoping that they help to offset my Abnormal Psychology grade), and then…applying to grad school? I’m thinking of four options for the coming academic year as a whole:

1. I apply to grad school, get into somewhere good, and get ready to head out in Fall 2009.
2. I apply to grad school, don’t get into anywhere I like, and then decide to wait it out for another year (and get more RA experience) and re-apply in Fall 2009.
3. I apply to grad school, don’t get into anywhere I like, and then decide to try some pre-med classes. Because…maybe I wanna be a doctor? Or a MD PhD? That would be pretty badass (although I’d be in school forever).
4. I apply to grad school, don’t get into anywhere I like, and then just…decide to join the Peace Corps. Maybe I wanna do something completely different before I settle into my career. I’d come back and then try for grad school again, of course. Or maybe I’d never come back??

So this coming year should be big for deciding…well, what I’m going to be doing with the rest of my life, essentially. It’s kind of a big deal.